It's tough being a citizen of any country, you have to accept the known stereotypes. You have to accept what that some people will hate you for things your government deem to be acceptable behavior, although it never is. You have to put up with your taxes being wasted on nonsense that you may not agree with. Worst of all, I guess, you have to deal with the archaic laws and practices of a group of people charged with taking the country forward, but at the same time never accept, or take in to account that times change, people change and the world evolves.
Take for example the British Royal Family, this is a tricky subject in this country. The idea of a Queen, Princes and Princesses may seem like a bit of a joke to many around the world, and to many in the UK, equally there are a high percentage of Loyal Royalists who think that it sets us a part, having this system. Letting a family of inbred Germans bleed the country dry while giving very little back.
While the world watched The Royal Wedding last year, millions of people saw it as a true love story, Will and Kate. The Prince and the Commoner, as it was billed. Love it may have been, but there were more sinister reasons for the coupling. Maybe not completely factual, I am literally making this shit up as I go, but I'll try and make it as believable as possible.
When the Queen married Prince Phillip of Greece, she did so in the wake of WW2 while Britain was in the depths of recession. It was no coincidence that Wills and Kate married in similar circumstances. Post-ish war (we will never be post war again), recession, people in need of a good time. A return to British values (whatever they may be). There is one massive difference between the two couplings, Kate and William are in no way related. This difference is the main reason for the marriage.
Incest plays havoc on the gene pool. Had they kept on down the same cousin fucking road that they have been on since they told all the peasants that "ze are taking control of ze country". Some fresh blood was needed, it is believed that the long serving Royal Doctor was simply fed up cutting off extra fingers and rounding the tops of heads. The baby that will inevitably be born of this tryst will stand a better chance being that the blood that flows in Kates Common veins is not the same as her husbands. This was the real big news, not the dress, not her ugly sister's skinny ass, not the service or guest list. New blood in the royal family is a cause for international celebration.
The crux of the matter, in my eyes, is that we allow these people to live for free under the belief that they are better than us. That the tainted blood which flows through their veins is in some way better than the blood which flows through ours, and that is coming from a guy who descended from Augustus, First Emperor Of Rome. Their system is an antique. It is in dire need of fixing. Which, I suppose, is where I come in.
To keep the Royalists happy I shall allow the Queen and her immediate family to continue the life they are accustomed to. Queen, Prince Phillip, Charles, the other brothers whose names escape me, and of course William and Illegitimate Harry. Everyone else has to get a job. No more free ride, your self imposed importance is invalid now that so many tax paying, honest and clean blooded citizens are living in poverty. As for the immediate family, it's performance time. The Queen doesn't do enough. Tradition can go fuck itself, daily performances for the tourists, while they change the guard, the Queen should be out meeting and greeting and posing for photos. As the times change, so should our outdated practices.
The likes of the Ugly Sisters, whom I can't remember the names of either, but I believe them to be the daughters of Fergie, the princess not the singer. They have to go. Same with Zara and her meathead husband.
I feel I have been too nice. An attempt to be diplomatic perhaps. So I'll finish by pointing out that these inbred German landgrabbers have drained this country dry with their catholic-level of pro-creation. There are too many of them. If all this wasn't bad enough they are also directly responsible for the rise of celebrity culture, it was practically invented to dupe the country into accepting Prince Phillip of Greece as their new Prince after he and then Princess, future Queen Elizabeth hit it off when she was just his 13 year old cousin. A mass campaign of proving his Britishness, and then the perceived notion forced into the minds of the public through the tabloid media that they were, in essence, part of the big wedding because without that idea the public might get a little miffed that they were spending tens of thousands on a wedding while the war weary public couldn't afford bread.
Sure, people will bitch and moan all day about immigrants playing the system, but why should people seeking refuge and a better life care about bleeding the system dry when it is a system watched over by the biggest scrounging family in the history of Britain?
Their time has come, it's over, this is just me bitching about shit that is coming to an end anyway. As the country becomes more and more diverse, the need, or understanding the need for a Royal Family becomes more and more obscure. They should be put to work. All of them. Prince Phillip should have been given his own show years ago where we introduce him to various people of ethnicity and just wait for the magic to happen. The Queen should be out meeting the public on a daily basis, shaking hands, posing for photos. Charles should be made to tap dance on the roof of the palace in order to, in some small way, earn all the play medals he wears at official events.
Millions of people turn out per year to look at a big, garish palace in the middle of London, the Royals don't really need to be in it, these people would come anyway. So this is almost me being nice to the Royal family, their time is short, they must adapt or become obsolete. If they pulled their weight a bit with the tourists the country would generate more money. If there is ever a good looking one she could pose for playboy and pump the fee into the tax payers pockets. But that is way off. We will wait and see if Kate and Wills have a good looking child. Something on par with the Queen when she was around 19/20. That would do, she was born at the wrong time. She was hot, and if you look closely at photos, she was hiding a magnificent pair of tits. Such a waste.
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